Monday, July 9, 2012

New Title 'Gothic' by Nicole D. Fergusson

Goodness, it's been a while since I posted here, hasn't it? I come to you today, fresh from my first day at a new job, thinking that I will have a couple of weeks away from my writing to recharge and re-energise after the last week of restructuring one novel, editing another and beginning two new ones. Here I am, ready to take the world by storm.


 Photobucket 

(in a couple of weeks) 

Then today, I get an email from my friendly, neighbourhood publisher. "Erm, ehm, promotion, promotion, promotion." Imagine me headdesking at this moment as I scratch my head and utter, 'I knew I forgot something...' So! Leap of Faith LLC have been kind enough to take a ... leap of faith :D ... with my new novel Gothic, which is in final stages of editing and awaiting cover art.

Gothic is the first in a new paranormal romance series sketched together in the middle of my Honours year last year (much less stressful than the writing I was actually researching and getting marked on, I tell you! (Anyone who has ever done an Honours year can tell you this is true.)) Of course, then I talked to my partner about this book I had just written and he said, 'So what happens if you did this next...?' and so a series was born.

But Gothic... I have had so much fun writing this story. It's a story of a human girl, Dahlia, who's mother died when she was eight. After her father ran away with grief, she was taken in by her vampire godmother and the rest of the werewolf pack of which her father had been a part. When the story starts, Dahlia has just moved out of home and wants to live the 'normal' life, i.e. a life without quite so much vampire and werewolf influence. In the first few weeks of class, she finds out that her godmother has contacted one of her vampire friends to watch over her. He, Elliott, ends up being one of her confidants. Another student, and human girl, Renee ends up being another close friend.

Hijinx ensue! Time for some more visual assist:

Renee meets our girl Dahlia through her normal university boyfriend. She's super cute and acts about half her age because she wants to get the university experience "just right". Elliott is another supernatural featuring in Dahlia's full supernatural dance card. He is of the mild snark and general hilarity, and claims at times to have brushed elbows with such popular figures as Lord Byron and Bram Stoker.

One of the best parts of this story is that I have clear images for both of these characters. The lovely actors who are acting as muses in my head right now are none other than the lovely Ms Ksenia Solo from Lost Girl and Mr Ian Somerhalder (nicknamed 'Smoulderhalder' with good reason by fellow cast mate AND GIRLFRIEND Nina Dobrev) from The Vampire Diaries. Say what you will about these shows, but these two people are gorgous. Anyone who knows me will know I shamelessly fangirl this TV series that is based on the L. J. Smith series of books from my childhood.

So that's me and mine for in the last little while. More news and excerpts to come next time I get a chance to be on the computer.

Because He Needs me

Because He Needs Me/Lynn Granville published by Leap of Faith in ebook and print is a sweet medical reminiscent of the line by Mills and Boon. It was given a four star review recently and praised for it's style. This book is a story of selfless love and contains mild sex scenes so its for people who want a love story in the old style .
A new book called The Bastard will be coming from Leap of Faith and Anne Ireland soon - this one is a saga set in the 1920's through to WW11 Hope you enjoy. If you would like a feww copy of any of my Anne Ireland books in ebook, just mail me at linda'Lindasole.co.uk

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

My New Release: Heart Song


Heart Song 

Released June 29, 2012
ISBN: 9781476235066
Short Story 53 pages
Publishing by Rebecca Vickery Publishing

Facing death might change Gideon’s life.

Blurb:

Gideon thought he had the perfect life as a musician with a beautiful model as his girlfriend, until he was diagnosed with breast cancer.

Ashamed and afraid he may die, Gideon hits bottom when his girlfriend dumps him for a real man.

Hope comes in the form of his father’s ghost and a person he has just met. Can he beat the odds and survive? And if he does, can he ever find happiness again?

Excerpt:


Maybe it was the morphine that caused him to slip into some kind of hallucination or maybe he was just dreaming—or wishing. The room appeared filled with white fog so thick that nothing remained visible beyond the bed where he lay. A fragrance drifted on the fog almost like a memory of forest, pungent cedar, rich, leaf-covered earth and sun warmed water.
Gideon knew before the form appeared through the fog to stand at the foot of his bed that his father had come to him. He closed his eyes against the visage and yearned for it to be real even though he knew it couldn’t be. His parents had died two years ago in a car accident. But, when he blinked his eyes open once again, his dad was still there—a slim, tall man wearing waders and a fishing hat over his thick, silver hair. A narrow fringe of white mustache graced his upper lip as he smiled that lopsided way that Gideon remembered so well. He seemed so real that Gideon felt a lump of suppressed emotions form in his throat and wanted to cry with pure joy. All he could manage to say in a whisper was, “Pop? Is that you?”

BUY LINKS:


Amazon.com
http://www.amazon.com/Heart-Song-ebook/dp/B008G1GKJ0/
Smashwords
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/177196
Monkeybars
https://www.monkeybars.net/PbRJV
https://www.monkeybars.net/monkey/thing/5585f4cdefcaaa1f6d7fabaf22ced78e
COVER CODE:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKG4mcZS3vaPUcrkQhHh9_x6D08toMhHqhc9AB11KuVFFw4lIDxeQe1ehjwvybYhyALUxFD3QK5uMLoglZATtihKDINQ3-ek2VYe9StyKYGkk0UNyIuzTYPYGC80ZIQKg-9bg5LztQ29I/s320/Heart+song+Cover.jpg

MY Amazon Page for Heart Song
http://www.amazon.com/Heart-Song-ebook/dp/B008G1GKJ0/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1341074735&sr=8-1&keywords=Heart+Song+by+Sarah+McNeal

I'll be giving away a free copy of HEAR SONG on Thursday. All you have to do to have a chance to win is leave a comment. Pretty easy, isn't it? Here's the tag to my blog on July 5th.
Sarah’s Provocative Ponderings:  http://pasttheprint.blogspot.com/
I hope to see you there!
In the meantime, have a wonderful Fourth of July and be safe if you're traveling.







Sunday, June 3, 2012

A Sample of the World’s Most Romantic Love Poems by Libby Mercer


John Harrington, the hero of my debut novel, Fashioning a Romance, has a few personality quirks, one of which is randomly spouting off quotes from a wide variety of books and poems. So in the spirit of John’s compulsion to quote – and because Fashioning a Romance is indeed a romance – I thought I’d compile a list of the most romantic love poems I can find. Some of them are pretty long, so I’ve just taken my favorite bits out to share with you here. And here they are, in no particular order:


1.      How Do I Love Thee? (Sonnet 43) by Elizabeth Barrett Browning
I know. It’s not exactly a revolutionary choice, but Browning’s poem encompasses so much in so few words. It’s timeless.

“I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight”

“Smiles, tears of all my life; and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.”


2.     I carry your heart with me by e. e. cummings
I challenge you not to sigh wistfully after reading this poem in its entirety. It really is so beautiful.

“I carry your heart with me (I carry it in
my heart) I am never without it”

“I fear
no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) I want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)”


3.     Rememberings by Peter Robson
Thank goodness for Google and the Internet. Otherwise I never would have found this little gem by a contemporary poet I’d never heard of before.

“I also know for me you’re the one
In spirit, body and soul
Forever, whenever, wherever you be
You are the half of my whole”


4.     To My Dear and Loving Husband by Anne Bradstreet
Nearly four hundred centuries after this poem was penned, the warmth from these words is almost palpable. Talk about your warm fuzzies…

“If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever a man were lov’d by wife, then thee.”

“My love is such that Rivers cannot quench,
Nor ought but love from thee give recompense.”


5.     La Vita Nuova by Dante Alighieri
This may seem like an odd choice. Dante’s poem is simple and straightforward, not flowery (which I mean in a good way!) like the others, but it really spoke to me. It’s a short poem, so here it is in its entirety:

“In that book which is
My memory…
On the first page
That is the chapter when
I first met you
Appear the words…
Here begins a new life”

What can I say? The concept that the moment when two soul mates sparks a new life gives me a warm, tingly feeling.

Also, I was thrilled to find this poem by Dante, as there’s a pivotal scene in Fashioning a Romance when John and his new love, Caitlyn, stand before Rodin’s iconic sculpture “The Kiss” which, as I learned, is based upon two actual historic characters whose story is revealed in Dante’s Inferno. I love it when things all come together full circle like this.

I had a blast researching art and literature for Fashioning a Romance. I hope you enjoyed my list and that I was able to incite a smile or even a wistful sigh.

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Visit with Ciara Lake


Hello Moonlight Romance Blog, thank you for having me.  I’m Ciara Lake and very excited to communicate with readers and authors. 
Writing is a joy.  The moment it becomes no longer joyous I will feel different about it.  But for now I rush home to write.  I have a difficult day job where escape from it is wonderful.  I love to escape into my worlds of fiction.   I can manipulate these fantasy worlds as I wish.  How great is that!  I sometimes just spend time thinking about my plots, sort of like daydreaming as a therapy.  I jot down notes I later use when weaving my new worlds. 
                This new career has helped me make some great friends and or collogues.   Patricia, Elise, Regina, Pam and the list is growing.  I’ve worked with great publishers too.  I believe we all share the dream to be successful while having fun writing.  To me writing is like art.  I create art as I write a new world into existence.  It’s like painting with words. 
                If you are interested in writing… get started.  For so many years I dreamed of writing and did not do it.  Then one day I decided to write and the rest is history.  I was lucky to find someone to mentor me.   I suggest reading, communicating on blogs and you can find a mentor to help you as well.  There are secrets to the industry just like in any career.  A mentor can help you find your way making it an easier venture.  
                In June I am going to a convention with Lori Foster, Reader’s Get Together in Ohio.  I am very excited to go visit with other authors and fans.  Some of the authors there are favorites of mine.  That will be nice to meet them.  This author world is so different from being a lawyer, it’s refreshing.  It’s exciting and fun.  I am really grateful to those you enjoy my books.  Thank you for reading them.  I welcome any suggestions or comments to me directly about my books too.
Please read the series I am writing with Elise Whyles.  The series is a new twist on Vampires and other immortals.  One of my biggest joys is brain storming with Elise regarding our stories.  Working together to get the world and characters to come to life is exhilarating.    
                May 21, 2012 my next book is going to be released with Beachwalk Press, Curse of A Dragon’s Claim, Forsaken series book 2.  I am very excited for this series to launch.  Elise Whyles book was already released in April, Forsaken Heart.   Enjoy this new twist on immortals among us.  

Curse of a Dragon's Claim by Ciara Lake
The Forsaken Series, Book 2
Genre(s): Erotic Paranormal Romance
Digital ISBN: 9781937325268
Length: Novel
Publication Date: May 21, 2012
Price: $5.50
The flame within a dragon warrior's heart awakens Arianna's passion as she begins a journey in which she will discover she's something more than she ever imagined possible.
The realm of the dragons is a world of magic, danger, and mystery. For centuries they've been at war with the vampires, but now the two enemies must work together to save all immortals, and the mortals they co-exist with, from an ancient evil. In order to do so, they need the help of the Forsaken, descendants of immortals who were cast out into the human realm, their memories wiped clean of their true heritage.
Clayne MacDagon is a powerful dragon warrior who is sent on a mission to find one of the Forsaken. Although he's told that this woman is his fated mate, he can't believe it could possibly be true. Arianna Mergliano possesses both dragon and vampire blood, and Clayne has an intense hatred for anything even remotely related to vampires, the evil beings who were responsible for his beloved twin's death.
When Arianna meets Clayne, she's convinced that the man is insane, or maybe he's a warlock or even the devil himself, but whichever it is, she wants nothing to do with him.
Clayne knows he can't fail at his mission. And once he meets Arianna he also knows that what he's been told is true—she is, ironically, his intended mate.
Convincing her to accept him is only the beginning. He has to protect her from those who might want her dead. Together, they must face the shadows and evil that have long plagued the immortal realms and find a way to survive the coming war.
Content Warning: graphic sex, some violence
Thank you, Ciara Lake.  

http://www.ciaralakeromancebooks.com

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

The Allisons and the Titanic by Lynn Hones


The story of the RMS Titanic still haunts people 36,500 sunrises after that horrific morning the numb survivors rowed the few lifeboats to their rescue ship, Carpathia. As a young child I watched A Night to Remember, the black and white 1958 film adaptation of Walter Lord's book of the same name. It fascinated me, scared me and woke me up to the reality of what exactly class distinction was all about.
I questioned my parents extensively about why the majority of the people who perished that dreadful night were the poor, and why they were kept locked in their doomed, third class level. As best they could, they explained class distinctions, and our own upper, middle and lower classes right here in America. However, because of the Titanic, those distinctions blurred some, and if the same event were to happen today, hopefully, class or financial stability would not come into the matter of who was worthy of life and who was not. Although some would argue that such distinctions still exist and life and death situations are still played out by financial reasoning.
Throughout the last century, it’s come to light that the third class was never barred or held at gunpoint from reaching the deck where the lifeboats were filling up. Regardless, the fact remains; those who suffered the worst were the poor. Fifty-three children died that night, fifty-two of them third-class passengers, one, being a first class passenger.
Which brings me to one of the stories that most fascinates me about the Titanic. It’s the story of the Allisons. Millionaires, Hudson and Bess Allison boarded the great ship in Southhamptom, after conducting business in Europe, for their trip back to Montreal. With them were their two children, Loraine, age two and Trevor, eleven months, along with a number of staff.
No one will ever really know the true story as to why Loraine Allison ended up being the only child in first or second-class to die, but the story is heartrending. The account most often told has the nurse of baby Trevor, Alice Cleaver, taking him to the boat deck and getting into a lifeboat without his mother or father’s knowledge. This led his mother, Bess, who was nervous by nature, to refuse a seat on a lifeboat until her son was found. Clinging to young Loraine, the frantic parents searched the tilting ship in an attempt to locate their baby.
How many of us in this situation would do the same thing? Could any of us get on board a lifeboat knowing one of our children was unaccounted for? However, the fact that Hudson would have to stay on the doomed ship no matter what, being that the call was for woman and children, couldn’t Bess have simply gotten herself and Loraine to safety and been assured by her husband that he would find Trevor?
Keep in mind, all these life and death decisions had to be made while a growing panic rose around them. Flares being fired, the alarm of other passengers running back and forth, perhaps even gunfire sounding in the air. Whatever had been the case, by the time they heard that the baby had gotten aboard a lifeboat with his nurse and was safe, it was too late to save themselves and their tiny daughter, Loraine. Accounts have them last seen standing on the deck, huddled together, smiling.
It’s haunting in the horror of it. To face death in such a terrifying situation is bad enough, but to face it with your child snuggled in your arms would be absolutely unimaginable.
In the end, little Loraine’s body, nor her mother’s, were ever found. Hudson Allison’s body was found and buried in the family cemetery.
Baby Trevor grew to be a handsome young man of eighteen before food poisoning finished off what the Titanic couldn’t. He was buried next to his father.
This is, pardon the pun, only the tip of the ice burg in detailing the life and tragic death of the Allison’s and the conjecture of what exactly happened to them that starry night. Follow my blog tour as I discuss other heartbreaking families and their last night of life on board the doomed pleasure palace, Titanic.

Blurb:


Beautiful Cornelia Bainesworth cared only about herself and her own life the night the Titanic went down. A curse brought on by a woman who witnessed her selfish behavior that evening destroys her, but it doesn’t stop there.
One hundred years later, the curse rears its ugly head in the life of small-town teenager Callie. As if the tragedy of her boyfriend’s death wasn’t enough, strange occurrences bring her to the brink of insanity. Callie’s search for answers is unsuccessful until a nerdy schoolmate takes up her cause and together they experience frightening apparitions, unexplained phenomena and chilling truths. These truths turn Callie’s life upside down and reveal a shocking ending to a story that began on the deck of a ship doomed the moment it saw light.

Excerpt:


Callie went to her window and stared out at the streetlight in front of their house. Lost in thought, she caught a quick movement, but ignored it. When she saw a small child peek out from behind a telephone pole and looking up into her window, however, she grew concerned.
“What the hell?” She watched the little figure’s head dart from behind the pole, look up at her and quickly retreat back. It seemed to either be playing games with her, or trying to hide.
“Hey, you? What are you doing up so late?”
The child gave no reply. She walked out of her room, down the stairs and opened the front door. I bet some neighbor kid walked out of their home and can’t find how to get back.
Stepping out on the porch, she wrapped her arms around herself. The air was still hot and muggy, but it was worry, not chill that had her hugging her body.
“Hey? Where are you? Come here.”
No movement, but she saw an arm still visible from around the pole. Gathering some bravado, she stepped off the porch and walked toward it.
“Hello. Don’t be afraid. Are you lost?”
The person stepped out from behind the pole.
Callie’s eyes had adjusted enough to see a boy with light hair and fair skin. His clothes, if that’s what they could be called, were rags. A gray suit, that had to be several years old, hung off his skeletal frame.
“Hi, honey. What are you doing out here so late?” Callie squatted and held out her arms for the boy, hoping to show him she meant no harm. His dirty, drawn face held the soul of an adult, although he couldn’t be older than three or four years.
“Tis late?”
“Yes, it’s two-thirty in the morning. Where do you live? Where are your mommy and daddy?”
“I don’t know,” he said shyly.
She caught the distinct brogue of the Irish in his speech. “You don’t know? Well, where do you think you live?”
He pointed down the road.
“Is it close by?”
He shook his sad little head. “No.”
“Okay, look, come with me. I’ll get my car and drive you home. Do you think you can find it if we drive and look for it?”
The waif nodded, yes.

Once in the car, she drove for about a mile. Every so often, she glanced at the boy to see if he recognized anything.
“Nothing looks familiar, huh?”
The child shivered.
“Are you cold, honey? Here, I’ll put the windows up.”
“Thank you kindly, ma’am.” He sat up, straightened his legs and looked out the window, obviously searching for something familiar. His thin hands were folded neatly in his lap, but rose occasionally to point the way. Callie realized he was leading them to the neighborhood where the Coopers lived, Bainesworth Manor. It butted up against a large field that turned into woods further back. On the other side of the street were miles of barren farmland, waiting patiently for the inevitable McMansion to be built. However, they drove past Bainesworth Manor and about a half mile down the road he spoke.
“Here it is,” he said timidly.
She pulled into a dark, park-like area barren of any homes. Her blood ran cold when, upon closer inspection, she noticed it was no park, but a cemetery. Not just any cemetery either, this was the kind of cemetery where skeletons wandered and witches made their brew. The kind where werewolves hid behind gravestones and hands reached up from the netherworld, searching around for the ankles of unsuspecting mortals stupid enough to be in a graveyard after dark. She pressed the gas pedal, but instead of moving, the car died.
“What?” Frantically, she turned the key and the engine turned over once and stopped. After several more tries she realized if she continued she’d simply flood the engine. She reached into her purse for her cell phone. In her panic, she’d forgotten her passenger and looked across at him.
“Sweetie, this is a graveyard. It’s not your home.” Unable to find her phone, she dumped the contents of her purse between the driver and the passenger seat.
“Dammit. This is not happening.” Without even glancing his way, she apologized for her use of foul language.
Resigned, she sat back in the seat and stared ahead. “Great, I guess we can walk to the Coopers.” She put all the items back into her purse. Slinging it over her shoulder, she grabbed a flashlight out of the glove box and stepped out of the car.
“Come on, honey. I know some people who live a bit down the road. We can wake them up and hope they won’t be too pissed off.” She glanced at the squirt. “I’m sorry, again. I mean angry.”
This cemetery was unknown to her, but from the looks of the dates she spotted as they walked, it had filled up long ago. The new one, where Blake was buried, was on the other side of town.
She glanced up at the full moon. “Queue the howling.”
Attempting a bravado she didn’t possess, she closed the door and moved away from the car. The moon cast enough light to see perfectly.
“I’m fine walkin’. My home is right there.”
“I don’t see any houses.”
He pointed into the cemetery.
“You live past the graveyard? Are you sure you don’t want me to walk with you?”
“If you be a wishin’ to.”
She smiled at him. “Come on, let’s get you home to your mother.” She put her hand reassuringly on his shoulder.
“Me mother is dead.”
“Who do you live with? Your daddy?”
“Never been knowin’ me dad.”
“Well, you must live with someone.”
“All the kind people. They don’t know me, but when I get to cryin’ someone will rise up and come to me.”
Large prickly gooseflesh covered her body from head to toe at that comment. Something wasn’t right. She’d suspected it the first time she’d laid eyes on the boy, but now, she knew for sure.
He began to walk. In the middle of the graves in a noticeably older area, he stopped and turned toward her. He seemed to grow paler, thinner, and sadder. He took a couple more steps, stopped and stared down.
“I be home now, mum.” His expression was heartrending, his large eyes rose and met hers.
“What?” She looked at him. “There’s nothing here but weeds.”
“I’m home. Tis my home ‘til the curse be lifted.”
Stunned at his words, Callie backed away. “What are you talking about?”
“The curse, ma’am. It’s stickin’ good.”
A wind picked up and, before her eyes, he metamorphosed into a mist, which swirled about for a moment before sinking into the ground.
A cold sweat broke out on her skin and a crippling fear stabbed roughly at her chest. An ugly, wintry fright came close to bringing her to her knees and impaled her to the spot. Paralyzed, she willed herself to breathe.
“How…why?” She gathered her courage and backed away, clutching her stomach, forcing the urge to vomit away.
“Dear, God, what just happened?”


 

Monday, April 30, 2012

Character Interview: Lynsey Reznor


Today I’m pleased to get a chance to visit with my heroine, Lynsey Reznor, from my contemporary romance Back To You. Lynsey is going is going to talk a bit about her reasons for leaving Unity when she was a teenager.

NNB: Lynsey, thank you for agreeing to talk about your early years in Unity. Can you tell me about your life before you left at sixteen?

LR: Well, the only family I had was my mother. My father died when I was young—I don’t remember him. I had a normal childhood, I guess. My mother was always there for me. I loved her tremendously.

NNB: I understand you have always been a whip-smart cookie!

LR: I suppose so. I skipped over two grades, so I was actually sixteen in my senior year of high school.

NNB: When you were sixteen, you were offered a scholarship to a school in Lausanne, Switzerland. Did you feel torn between accepting the scholarship and staying on in Unity?

LR: Sixteen was a difficult age for me. I developed a crush on my best friend Suzy’s brother, Nick. I thought he liked me as well, but…he chose to peruse a relationship with another girl.

NNB: That must have hurt very much.

LR: My first love, my first heartbreak. It caused me to rebound to another guy.

NNB: Caleb Smith?

LR: Yes, Caleb. A decent guy, but he pressured me for a commitment I wasn’t ready for.

NNB: So you fled Unity?

LR: Pretty much. But I certainly don’t regret it. I even stayed on in Switzerland an additional four years. I feel quite grateful to have been able to travel and be educated in Europe. My French became fluid and effortless, and I learned to ski. All in all, a great life experience.

NNB: I heard there was also a romance with an Olympic ice hockey player?

LR: Ah…Jean-Luc. How I did enjoy my time with him. But the relationship ran in its course. We do remain friends to this day. He’s a coach with an NHL team now. Every time his team came to Florida we always would get together for dinner and speak to each other in nothing but French. He is still the smoothest man I’ve ever known.

NNB: Sounds like fun. Do you miss Miami yet?
LR: Not really. Like my time with Jean-Luc, my time in Miami was great while it lasted, but a thing of the past nonetheless. I am happy, excited, and looking forward to returning to my hometown of Unity.

NNB: Much luck, Lynsey, I wish you nothing but the best and I hope you find everything you are looking for in Unity.
Read more about Lynsey and her life in Unity in Back To You, available now at Bradley Publishing!


Blurb:

On the surface, Lynsey Reznor seems to have it all. She is beautiful, brilliant, and a successful true-crime writer who has been living the past decade in Miami. But what Lynsey lacks is what she needs the most—a family.

After the death of her mother, and yet another failed relationship, Lynsey makes an impulsive decision to return to her hometown of Unity. But Unity will present its own bittersweet memories, most notably, her first love, Nick Lincoln.

Twenty years ago, Nick broke teenager Lynsey’s heart when he decided to marry another. He had his own private reasons—reasons he never explained to Lynsey. Now she is back, along with a chance to reclaim her love. But Lynsey wants answers from him that he may never be able to give out of duty and guilt.


Excerpt:

When he heard her, he came to her, took her into his arms, and kissed her. It was a comfort that he wasn’t regretting their lovemaking. She didn’t think she could handle being rejected by him twice in her lifetime.
     “Do you have to leave soon?” she asked.
     “I’m sorry. I don’t want to, but I have to.” He went to the stove and prepared her a cup of coffee. “I think we should start planning our wedding. We could be married at Christmas.”
     She was taken aback. Is this his proposal?  This was supposed to be so romantic and memorable, not talk about planning a Christmas wedding while he stirred a cup of coffee.
     “Do you even want to get married?” She took the coffee mug he offered. “I mean, it wasn’t that long ago that you told me you weren’t sure you ever wanted to be married again. You said you didn’t see fatherhood in your future, and Nick, I want a baby…more than one. I grew up as an only child and I was so alone. I don’t want my child to have to experience that.”
     “Well, I didn’t use a condom last night. You could be pregnant right now,” was his reply.
     Heaviness descended upon her heart. This was so not how she wanted this morning to be, and certainly not the marriage proposal she had dreamed of. “I’m on the Pill—I won’t get pregnant if that’s all you’re worried about.”
      “I’m sorry, that’s not the only reason we should get married.”
     “Then why?” she asked suspiciously.
     He let out an exaggerated sigh. “Lynsey, I don’t have time to get into this with you right now. What do you want me to say in the five minutes I have before I leave for work?”
     She couldn’t believe his glib attitude.  “How about saying something to me like…‘I love you, Lynsey, and I made a tremendous mistake by not marrying you twenty years ago?’ That would take you less than thirty seconds to say, and you could have easily gotten to your precious job on time.”
     Suddenly his jaw set and his eyes narrowed. “I didn’t make a mistake by not marrying you twenty years ago! I let you go to become a success in life—and you did. I can’t regret that!”
     “So, what I thought all these years was correct. I was nothing to you but a quick and easy way to shed your virginity.” Just saying the words was devastating.
     “That’s not it at all,” he vehemently insisted. “You were always so intelligent. I mean, you were a sixteen-year-old senior in high school! Just how many grades did you skip over, anyway?”
    “Two,” she answered in a low voice.
    “Do you know what would have happened if I hadn’t married Kelly?” He didn’t wait for her reply. “I’ll tell you what. You and I would have been ostracized by everyone in this town! We would have had to be married right away, and we would have had to live with your mother, because I had no money.”
     “My mother loved you. She would have been happy to have us live with her,” she interjected.
     “And we were so naïve, Lynsey. You would have graduated high school with either a big belly, or a baby in your arms…if you had graduated at all.”
     She crossed her arms over her breasts and looked at the floor. She was too afraid that if she looked at him she would break down. “Some of the girls in school were married. A few of them had babies.”
     He lifted her chin and forced her to make eye contact with him. “And you were too smart to be stuck in this town, and just another housewife. You would have become bored and resentful.”
     “I wouldn’t have known the difference,” she countered.
     “I had serious doubts then. I still have doubts now,” he admitted.
     Her dark lashes flew upward. “What is that supposed to mean?”     
    “I believe that you will become bored and restless in Unity and will want to go back to Florida or maybe California. I have a job and a family here, Lynsey. I don’t ever want to give that up. I’m afraid that we’ll have a child, and you’ll take my baby and leave. I can not allow that to happen.”
     She couldn’t believe what he was saying. Nothing was further from the truth. “Do you think I would have sunk so much of my savings into that house just to abandon it? I would never, ever do what you’re saying. But if circumstances changed, I would expect you to support what was best for our family. Couples who are committed make sacrifices for each other!”
     It was becoming clearer and clearer that things were rapidly falling apart between them.
     “Lynsey, didn’t what happened between us last night mean anything to you?” he asked.
     She chuckled unpleasantly. “I suppose that with us living in such close proximity, last night was inevitable. But don’t worry about it happening again, Nick. When you get home this evening, I won’t be here.”     
    “Where are you going to be?”
     She wanted to hurt Nick like she was now hurting. “I’m sure that Caleb wouldn’t mind me bunking down at his house for a week or two.”
    “Over my dead body,” he seethed. “I will drag you away from him kicking and screaming if it comes to it. I’ll handcuff you to my bed if need be. Believe me, Lynsey, I’ll do it!” He flopped down into a kitchen chair and buried his face in his hands.
     “I have to go now, Nick. I’m meeting your sister for breakfast. Listen to me. You need to pull yourself together. In your line of work, bad things happen when you lose your concentration.”
     When he didn’t reply, she let out a sigh of resignation and headed for the door. At the last minute she turned to him. “Thanks for almost making it happen between us.”
   



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